Andrew Williams vs State of Minnesota, RAMSEY COUNTY DISTRICT COURT, Ramsey County Civil Commitment Division, RAMSEY COUNTY SHERIFF'S DEPARTMENT, Jodi Harpstead, Dakota County District Court, 09-CV-24 (2024)

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`09-CV-24-3
`
`Filed in District Court
`State of Minnesota
`3/1/2024 12:38 PM
`
`In order for you to be able to arrive at a judgement, I would like to emphasize the relevant facts
`involved in my case. While incarcerated, I have given serious and careful consideration to the
`contributing factors that were involved with actions of mine that brought harm to others, These
`contributing factors were a skewed perspective, I had adopted of the world, cognitive functions that
`were lacking maturity, causing visceral responses to situations, and the avoidance of it was through drug
`and alcohol use. I had become the person you have read about in yourfiles after having been broken
`early on in childhood.
`
`Within this letter I will provide you with the necessary information to understand how I became
`broken and the ways in which I was able to transform myself. I will begin by introducing the current
`offenses that were responsible for bringing me to prison. .
`
`A CURRENT OFFENSES
`
`(
`
`There is truth in the fact that, at the time of my crime spree, and even years prior to this, I did
`not take the time to understand the gravity of any of my actions and the long lasting marks they made
`on others. I am also aware that, on many occasions, I have done a good job portraying the worst side of
`humanity. My actions, twenty-plus years ago, have not been a great representation of who I wanted to
`be deep inside and who I have worked hard on becoming since. The worst of me is well documented in
`the court and institutional files that have been amassed. But, to take these facts alone to formulate an
`opinion of who I am today, will only distort your perspective as it would consist of a partial view. Allow
`me to provide you with an all-encompassing view of who Andrew Williams is.
`
`[.Offenses & the Impact On Victims
`
`It is necessary that I provide you with background information surrounding, November 7, 2002 -
`the night I sexually assaulted Akinyi. As I stated in court, in addition to, Dr, Peter Marston, due to my
`methamphetamine consumption I was hallucinating and having delusions. This was not then, nor is it
`currently, a means to circumvent responsibility but yet a causal factor in the situation. Furthermore, it
`was not my intention to go over to Akinyi's house to harm her. Although not intended, this was the
`result of my actions. I will never forget the day I entered the courtroom, and looking over at Akinyi
`sitting next to the victim advocate. She seemed all alone and still hurt from the pain I had caused her.
`The only way I could express sorrow for what I had done, was through mouthing the words "I - am -
`sorry". These words were spoken for no other reason than because I meant them, then, years after, and
`even today. Although these words of solace were all I had to give her, upon my release I intend to do
`everything I can to further free her from the pain I caused her. My intentions are to pay the debt I still
`owe her, and others, forward. Her pain has been interchanging, where it has allowed me to become a
`better person, or just simply breathed life into the person that laid dormant inside of me.
`
`I must also acknowledge the incident with the women in the gym parking-lot. On this day, the
`anticipation of danger from me was felt by her when I attempted to kidnap her. From what I can recall, I
`was going to hold her for ransom. I knew that her husband was the owner of a nightclub in downtown
`Minneapolis and thought I could get money for her. What I remember is wanting to leave the country
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`2
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`

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`09-CV-24-3
`
`Filed in District Court
`State of Minnesota
`3/1/2024 12:38 PM
`
`and this ransom money would be the means for me to be able to do so. Again, these actions were only
`induced by my intoxication.
`
`II.
`
`Diagnosis Reached by Dr. Peter Marston Connected With Offense
`
`It is not my intention to abandon modesty when saying the following about Dr. Peter Marston. I
`must convey the fact that through his failed diagnostic process, Dr. Marston misdiagnosed me. This is
`not something 1 am simply choosing to state today, but can, and will substantiate this with facts if
`requested in the future. For the record, during the diagnostic interview, Dr. Marston attempted to use
`coercion as a means of obtaining information. This became apparent after he attempted to obtain
`information from me outside of the initial interview and testing scheduled. Dr. Marston hatched a plot
`that involved, having a woman walk by the room we were interviewing in, where he stepped out to talk
`to her. Then he came back in the room and asked me if 1 knew her. He said that she new me from my
`past involvement with the juvenile court system, stating, "she wanted to help me." He told me to call
`her and proceeded to give me this woman's phone number. While at the jail in Goodhue County, I called
`the woman's phone number that Dr. Marston had given me. She introduced herself, told me she could
`help me, but "I needed to tell her everything" and attempted to interrogate me. It appeared that she
`was attemptingto persuade me to tell berthings that could be used against me in court, so I abruptly
`ended the call.
`
`Dr. Marston's psychological testing and assessment of me were morally and ethically corrupted.
`His means of acquiring information were an attempt to enhance the likelihood of civilly committing my
`person, where he arranged the tools and apparatus involved, For nothing other than the reason that,
`psychological testing and assessment practices were tainted by, Dr. Marston, his diagnosis should not be
`presumed accurate, nor admissible in any matter.
`
`B. PRIOR CRIMINAL OFFENSES & DISCIPLINE HISTORY
`
`I. Prior Criminal Offenses
`
`B 1991 - 5th Degree Assault -1 hit a girl after we got into an argument where she had hit
`me first. The use of drugs and alcohol was a factor in this incident.
`B 1992 - Millacs treatment -1 was not equipped to appreciate the opportunity I had in this
`placement, and I absconded, In part, because of my lack of appreciation, but als because
`I was in an uncomfortable situation: a boy named, Marty, was being molested by
`another resident a week prior to me deciding to run,
`B 1995 - This conviction has always been troubling to me. Due to the position of possibly
`facing legal jeopardy, i have refrained from elaborating on this matter.
`
`II. Discipline Inside of Department of Corrections (2003-Present)
`
`Below are the discipline infractions I am able to remember, where some require further
`information outside of the information represented and documented inside of the initial
`reports:
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`

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`09-CV-24-3
`
`Filed in District Court
`State of Minnesota
`3/1/2024 12:38 PM
`
`(chronological order - latest-to-earliest)
`
`MCF - STW - Masturbation charge - [GUILTY]: I was not guilty of this charge - this was a
`patently false and fabricated charge. I went to trial to prove the facts of the matter: i
`was asleep in my bed at count time when the reporting officer said I was masturbating.
`Chargers were eventually dismissed only after I cross-examined the reporting officer,
`where she admitted I was under a sheet and could not tell for sure what I was doing,
`(Witnesses: Terelle Shaw, 186147, Assoc. Warden. Lisa Stenseth, Lt. Warner, and the
`discipline hearing officer involved in the matter);
`MCF - FRB - p*rnography/Disorderly Conduct - [NOT GUILT/GUILTY): I was not in
`possession of p*rnographic ma terial. What I was in possession of were picture catalogs
`called "p*rn Star Edition" (from Flicl<s-4-U) that entered, and were approved, through
`MCF - STW's mailroom. The C.O. confiscated these and charged me with p*rnography.
`Though I was guilty of conduct that was disorderly;
`MCF - STW (A-East; galley 8) - Weapons charge; [GUILTY]: I possessed a weapon due to
`the need to protect myself from the previous inmate ("Box") who had pulled a knife and
`attempted to rob me, (Witnesses: Karon Baldwin, 188857, Ben-Archie Braylock, 166131,
`and Terelle Shaw, 186147);
`MCF - STW (A-East; galley 8); Fight/Assault; [GUILTY]: I fought an inmate who pulled a
`knife on me in my cell ("Box") and attempted to rob me. (Witnesses: Karon Baldwin, Ben
`Braylock, Terelle Shaw);
`MCF - STW - Cheeking medications - [GUILTY]: I was guilty of this charge - my motive for
`this was to be able to make money by selling my medication for the purpose of hiring an
`appellate attorney for my case;
`MCF - STW - Unauthorized use of medications - [GUILTY]: I was guilty of this charge -
`again, this was an attempt for me to sell "packs" to inmates for a profit;
`MCF - STW - Weapons charge - [GUILTY]: I possessed tattoo needles that I was using to
`tattoo others with;
`MCF - STW - p*rnography/Unauthorized use of medications (UUM) - [GUILTY]: I was
`guilty of possessing p*rnography. I got involved with selling p*rn pictures after a known
`informant, Karon Baldwin DID #188857 brought the idea of having my family send in
`p*rnographic pictures, where I would be able to get $10.00 a picture, and I went along
`with it. [UUM] I was also guilty of this;
`MCF - STW - Fight/Assault - [GUILTY]: I was guilty of this charge. Flow it started was that
`Marvin Johnson attempted to pay another inmate $100,00 to assault me; I had a
`problem with this and we ended up fighting;
`MCF - STW - Unauthorized Area - [GUILTY]: This was inaccurate but did not know
`enough at the time to be able to challenge this. The event as it occurred was, I was given
`two conflicting passes (one to the law library and one to the artroom) both were at
`6:00pm. I went to the law library to personally cancel the pass and to inform the
`librarian that I was unable to attend on Monday night's because I was working on
`projects in the artroom - subsequently sent to segregation.
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`

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`09-CV-24-3
`
`Filed in District Court
`State of Minnesota
`3/1/2024 12:38 PM
`
`C. PERSONAL HISTORY
`
`I. Intro
`
`By no means could any of the behavior I have exhibited in the course of the first three decades
`of my life be understood without further information. With the absence of the personal information I
`am providing you, the apologies herein expressed would remain hallow, the veracity in measuring my
`state of mind would be misapprehended and you would not be able to conceive the impetus I possess
`for success and improvement.
`
`My story begins with a wayward boy, lost in a world going on all around him. I was raised in a
`loving household with a great family. Though love was present in the home, it was not enough to sustain
`me. When growing up I was always involved in sports and activities, which helped me feel needed, but
`not necessarily loved. Around the time my adolescence rolled-around, life became more about what
`brand of clothes were people wearing, who was the strongest kid in school, and who was the most
`attractive person. Around this time girls began showing me attention. At this point in my life the
`application and understanding of love, how it was reciprocated, was transposed. Where love was once
`expressed and understood through the hugs and kisses I received at home, this expression of love, I now
`found myself acting out in other ways: the love I felt for material things, or the love I had from others
`noticing my appearance, and eventually, the love I received from the self-aggrandizing act of being
`promiscuous (I felt loved because these girls/women wanted me). What I found to be the baseline for all
`other issues in my life was, the need to feel loved/wanted, and searching for it in improper and
`unhealthy ways. My ability to choose to make the right decisions was impaired. This disfunctional state
`resulted from traumatic events that happened early on in my life,
`
`II.
`
`EMOTIONAL TRAUMA - HOW I BECAME BROKEN
`
`How does one become dysfunctional? I became dysfunctional from the effects of the emotional
`trauma inflicted upon me early on in my development as a child. At the age of five or six, I was sexually
`abused by the neighbor's daughter which had a major affect on me. This was a traumatic event that, not
`necessarily caused me pain, but, created a sense of turmoil that then resulted in a psychological shift in
`my thought process. I began acting out, I suppose, to prevent myself from being further hurt. But,
`determining what was wrong with me, psychologically, prior to entering prison in, 2003, was of no
`interest to me. The antidote for this was simply soothing it through the abuse of substances. This
`method only exacerbated the pain and allowed me to transmit it on to others. But one thing I have
`realized in reflecting on this issue is, the one thing I have always wanted is, to be loved and reciprocate
`my love. The way in which I understood and expressed this emotional desire was distorted due to being
`sexual abused. This had an affect on my character which thereby created a deficit in the qualities I both,
`internalized and exhibited.
`
`Furthermore, on numerous occasions, when I was a child, I experienced aggression from
`racists/bigots in my neighborhood, as well as at school. As a child it was hard to understand where this
`perspective could be validated. But one thing I learned during this period of my life was how to stand up
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`5
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`

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`09-CV-24-3
`
`Filed in District Court
`State of Minnesota
`3/1/2024 12:38 PM
`
`for myself, though in unhealthy ways. Fighting people I found was a way of getting my point across. At
`times I felt ostracized and gave into my impulses. This led to the many times I required placement in the
`juvenile system. This is what helped establish a cycle in my life.
`
`III.
`
`DEFICIENT CHARACTER - CAUSE FOR ME FAILING TO PAY ATTENTION TO EMPATHY &
`REMORSE
`
`As far back as the first time I was in prison (1996), I knew that I wanted to change the way I
`lived life, and the affects I had on others but did not know the depths in which I would need to go to find
`this change. Upon my arrival to prison in 2003 my desire to change became my first priority. This desire
`caused me to analyze the problems that brought me to prison - the primary issues in my life that
`influenced me to use drugs, and contributed negatively to the totality of my cognitive functions, thereby,
`resulting in actions that hurt others. But in order for me to take action and make changes in this cycle, I
`came to the realization that my character was deficient. This character deficiency gave shape to the way
`I viewed the world and the way I behaved in it.
`
`IV.
`
`EMPATHY & REMORSE - CATALYST FOR INTROSPECTION & CHANGE
`
`My desire to change would not have been possible without increasing my awareness of
`empathy and how to be more sensitive and understanding of the thoughts, feelings and experiences of
`others. If it were not for empathy and my desire of deconstructing the path my pain took in inflicting
`pain upon others, I may have never changed. Being aware of such has allowed me to think long and hard
`about my past actions, and how these actions have affected others. For instance, I have thought alot
`about the Swanson family and what they had to endure because of me. This story starts with a mother,
`and a father, who lost their son in a car accident. The only thing that remained for remembrance of him
`was his gravestone, along with pictures they possessed. These pictures were lost to them forever
`because of me and my careless actions when I burned down their home, back in 1988. Lynn Swanson,
`Carl Swanson, and the sibling's of the deceased brother, lost their son, and brother, forever because of
`me. These pictures were all they had of the memories they once shared. To this day, my heart goes out
`to them. Furthermore, my ability to empathize has been intensified by being the recipient of people's
`compassion like, Ms. Swanson. After all the pain I had caused her, and her family, she showed up at my
`sentencing on July 31, 2003, to take the stand and give character testimony in support of me. Empathy's
`affects also are not lost upon me when looking around to see the love, support, and forgiveness that I
`receive from my father and family as well as the prison staff whose redemptive footing guides us further
`along in our journeies.
`
`Truly, what I have come to understand is the actions of mine that caused others pain, were
`simply due to the pain residing inside of me. I was hurting and did not know how to ask for help. I held
`on to the idea that I had to be strong and tough, to learn how to deal with it on my own. This made me
`prone to the illogical thoughts, and actions I adopted, i.e,, use of alcohol, and drugs. This was my way of
`avoiding the pain that was inside of me. But it was time that I examine the derivative of my pain as a
`way of understanding the path it took - hurting others.
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`

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`09-CV-24-3
`
`Filed in District Court
`State of Minnesota
`3/1/2024 12:38 PM
`
`It has been remorse that has provided me with the desire to create a lasting change in my life. I
`can not stress enough how extremely remorseful I am for the events that took place back in, November
`of 2002. To the extent that I have taken the words I expressed to Akinyi to heart, and have allowed this
`to be the driving force to bring about my self-transformation. I knew then, as I know now, I never want
`to hurt another human being again.
`
`Subsequent to serving time in prison, I had never realized nor wanted to deal with the biggest
`issue i faced in life: my desire to love and be loved by the people in my life and the inability to
`understand positive ways of its expression. When I was younger and presented the opportunity to face
`this issue, via run-ins with the judicial system calling for me to be placed in correctional facilities or
`treatment centers, I either avoided dealing with this issue, or ran from them altogether, Once
`incarcerated, it was prison, in tandem with my profound remorse, and empathic reflections, that were
`the catalyst for me facing these issues. I could no longer physically run from them, and in my mind,
`avoidance was not beneficial. I wanted to help myself so 1 would be in a position to one day help others.
`These walls enhanced the reflective echoes from people I had harmed, impacting me to a degree that it
`forced me to pivot in the direction of wanting to enhance my cognitive mental processes, manage the
`visceral responses I manifested, and the elevate my spiritual values. But the next question for me was,
`where and how do I go about making enhancements to any of this? The only answer I was able to think
`of was to reflective inward and examine the thoughts and feelings that led to my actions.
`
`V.
`
`INTROSPECTION; THOUGHTS & BELIEFS
`
`As i began the introspective process of my thoughts and feelings I took notice of an area of
`interest (the attributes or features that make up and distinguish an individual) - my character. The
`values and beliefs I held deviated from what was normal. It was the understanding that my character
`was deficiency which allowed me to began thinking about ways to correct it. Reforming my character
`was necessary so that my determination to never harm another person, or cause anyone, anymore pain,
`could become a reality. But, how was I to go about accomplishing this when hurting others was never
`my intention? I further posed the question: what were the problems affecting me that allowed me to
`commit these acts? I needed answers to all of these questions in order to find a way to heal and
`effectuate change. These questions were a way of me locating the obscure roots of my problems. Within
`these indistinguishable roots resided the exact problems I had spent so many years running from. It was
`only through avoidance and doubting the existence of these problems that I was unable to recognize
`them sooner. Serving a lengthy prison sentence (in some ways) forced me to face myself so I could
`obtain the answers to all of my questions,
`
`Through the years of serving time, I found the best way to obtain any of these answers was by
`the introspective examination of my thoughts and feelings through constant interrogation of my
`motives. My delinquencies were many, and the remedy for this could only come in the form of
`understanding the significance of my habitual disposition. Once I better understood, not only the affects
`of my actions, but distinguish the source from where such wrongs derived from, then changes to my
`thought process could be made. I also knew that none of this would be possible (focusing on the adverse
`habits and impulses of mine) without first finding myself, my true self. It was only my true self, and my
`
`/
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`

`

`09-CV-24-3
`
`Filed in District Court
`State of Minnesota
`3/1/2024 12:38 PM
`
`desire to become acutely conscious of my state of mind and how it affected others, that would provide
`me the means for mending the emotional wounds I had been suffering from for so long. Who was I?
`Who did I want to be? And, how did I want the world to see me? The answer to these questions were of
`the greatest importance to me and my recovery. The answers to these questions would provide me with
`the necessary insight into my thought process - the inaccurate thinking I subscribed to - ultimately, this
`would enhance my person I wished to present to the world. Once I obtained the answers to these
`questions, I would have the ability to apply the highest standard of morality to my conduct, and would
`allow me to become more cognizant of other's feelings with respect to my actions. For all of this to take
`place it would involve a self-transformation, specifically, the metamorphosis of my mind,
`
`VI.
`
`INTROSPECTION; STATE OF MIND
`
`Transforming my state of mind, and increasing my ability to extend empathy was one of the
`things I focused on the most. The self-transformation of my psyche came via analyzing, not only former
`behaviors and relationships (both, positive and negative), but through analyzing and studying everything
`from my eating habits, sexual desires, all the way to the idiosyncrasies I possess. In my analysis, I even
`went as far back as looking into my childhood for answers, where I sought to study or determine the
`nature and relationship of the parts of: 1) empathy and malice - whether there were situations where I
`was partial to either emotion; and 2) when situationally I started to neglect empathy, or favor malice. All
`I was able to come up with was, in life, all I have ever wanted was to love and be loved by others. None
`of my actions have ever derived from a place of malignancy. It was impossible for me to remember any
`situation where my actions and behavior stemmed from a malicious intent; causing harm to another
`person for the purpose of receiving pleasure from their pain. Like when I accidentally burned down the
`Swanson home, this did not stem from anything other than an accident caused by impulsivity and
`neglect. Or the night I sexually assaulted Akinyi, this was not my intention, This is also true with any of
`the other illegal behaviors I took part in. My negligence In applying empathy, and my ability to fully
`understand this, as well as communicate it in an objectively explicit manner varied due to a lack of
`immaturity, on my part, and to the varying degree that drug-use played a part in my actions.
`
`VII.
`
`INTROSPECTION; DEDUCTIONS
`
`Impulsivity, immaturity, and the feeling of displacement in the world, were at the root of any
`and all my problems. These issues severely contributed to the deficiency in my character, and values I
`ascribed to. With this established, it was necessary that I find a way to balance these correlative
`conditions with an equal force so as to firmly enroot any of the transformation I sought. But what
`measures could I apply to my life that would have the most effectual force, and provide me with the
`ability to generate self-control - self-consciousness. I sought to become intensely aware of myself. Inside
`of this process I was able to bring conscious intellectual activity (such as thinking, and reasoning) to
`maturity, thereby self-control was unveiled. With this newly discovered gift, I was better equipped to
`figure out the answers to events that had unfolded in my life.
`
`Where impulsivity, immaturity, and a sense of displacement were attributes once applicable to
`me, these characteristics have been treated by refashioning my thoughts. Through studying the
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`

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`09-CV-24-3
`
`Filed in District Court
`State of Minnesota
`3/1/2024 12:38 PM
`
`teachings and methods held inside of moral philosophies, I was able to change the principles I had been
`previously employing. The heuristic methods aiding in this endeavor were various spiritual philosophies,
`in tandem with the philosophy and values prescribed under utilitarianism, and altruism: truth, justice,
`righteousness, compassion, and tolerance. These tenets are an Integral part of me. It is these morals I
`now envision extending outwards and Into the lives of other people upon my release. It is my hope that
`this may be the flashpoint that sparks the desire in others to travel the same road - overcoming the
`adversities that iie within.
`
`VIII. METAMORPHOSIS: THE INDIVIDUAL I AM TODAY
`
`I must also say that when looking back at my life, there was a point when I experienced much
`grief surrounding the wrong I had done; to know that I had been the cause of people's pain and
`heartache, was distressing. Although I am no longer troubled by such grief, only because I have the
`ability to see beyond just this. The very pain these people experienced, has been the antecedent for the
`exploration of my soul. The affects of their pain has not gone without a sense of value. It is my
`awareness and understanding of their pain that has allowed me the opportunity to study self and the
`cause of my actions. Any and all of the inimical behaviors I once exhibited have been remedied by a
`mind-set that stimulates positive patterns of thinking, and emotional responses that govern any/all of
`my actions. Ultimately, it was through understanding the experiences of my victims, that was a
`contributing factor for me wanting to obtain a better understand of myself. None of this would have
`been possible without the intense and absorbing respect for enriching my faith in a Supreme Power, and
`the principles of truth, generosity, and equity. If it were not for the people I have harmed, I may have
`never changed my life. My victims were my intervention. For this very reason I am forever indebted to
`any/all of the people I have transgressed against - for they are the impetus behind me finding myself
`and the psychological metamorphis I have undergone.
`
`Part of the process responsible for the metamorphosis in my life to ensure success in my daily
`life, begins with waking up between 4-5am, where I study, meditate, plan my day, and exercise. This
`processes also consists of the habits I commit myself to. By setting my sights on my character, I analyze
`my actions and their effects, in order to better understand the nature and relationship of these variables.
`This also involves consistently working on the thought processes I have had, and currently, subscribe to.
`I have also implemented a reflective process of: 1) self-analyzation through perennial examination -
`allows me to examine my thoughts and feelings; in addition to, 2) seeking advice from others - pointing
`out the good, or bad qualities in relation to issues that affect me. By doing this I am able to state, today,
`clearly and strongly, that I want and will be successful in all of my future endeavors. The only thing I lack
`confidence in, although remain hopeful, is that my transformation can be a means of mendings
`optimism in others.
`
`I can not say that any of this course was mapped out, because I did not take such a route. This
`was simply a characteristic emanation influenced by the ideologies embraced by utilitarianism and
`altruism. What I was able to plan for, which began early on in Dakota County Jail, was simply placing
`thought to finding a way to change in the future, What I can say, with absolute certainty, is that I am
`fortunate to have found the genesis of my habitual disposition. I understand the motivational factors
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`

`

`09-CV-24-3
`
`Filed in District Court
`State of Minnesota
`3/1/2024 12:38 PM
`
`attached to my actions, and have honed my ability to empathize with others, internalizingtheir
`experiences and employing such to guide my actions in the future.
`
`With that being said, I have always sought to take responsibility for my actions - that is why I
`plead guilty (as well as to spare Akinyi the pain and humiliation of taking the stand). I also see searching
`deep inside myself, as another means of accomplishing such task. Therein the fashioning of my morals
`has brought about the revivification of my mental identity and mental state, the degree to which, as
`quoted by the Gallic theologian, Vincent de Lerins: "quod semper, quod ubique, quod ab omnibus: -
`what is always, what is everywhere, what is by everybody believed.
`
`IX.
`
`CHEMICAL ABUSE; ORIGIN & RELAPSE
`
`I have not been involved in treatment very long, but I have visited the issue of chemical abuse in
`my life prior to entering the Paradigm program. What I have devised is that the central issue that led me
`to using chemicals and drinking was nothing more than a way to mask the hurt ! felt inside. I began using
`chemicals at the early age of fourteen or fifteen. This began when I began hanging around people who
`were using. Then, at the age of fifteen, there was an older woman (twenty-one) who had me living with
`her that use to get me to drink with her and her friends. This became a regular event. I am not sure how,
`but I found myself involved with older women who liked me to use with them.
`
`When I left prison in, 1996,1 had the desire to change, but did not have a plan to do so. My only
`thought was not to commit crime. I was unfamiliar with myself and what I needed to do to mak